Comic Book & Magazine Merch of the 60s
Kids Today Are Missing Out
Sure, they have tablets, iPhones, TikTok, and YouTube. They can stream anything they want when they want. They can even get a bot to do their homework. But X-ray vision? Asiatic insects? Live monkeys? Nope, nope, and double nope!
It was different back in the day. Maybe we didn’t have email, but we had the US mail. And we had comic books and monster magazines. And … whenever we wanted … we could order all kinds of stuff and have it delivered straight to our homes.
Newsletter Challenge #3
In the June 24 issue of the Minute-Men: Execute & Run Newsletter, we asked readers to identify one item (pictured above) that was too outrageous to be offered for sale in magazines and comics back in the 1960s.
How did folks do?
Let’s take a look.
Asiatic Insects
What’s in the box?
It’s Horrible Herman, “the hideous ASIATIC INSECT [with] fur body, scaly head, red eyes, twin tendrils.” At least, that’s how he was described in the ad that ran in Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine.
I never ordered a Herman. Never even saw one until I found the above image on eBay, where you can buy a case of vintage Hermans for $750! That’s a lot of allowance money, but back in the 60s, you could order Horrible Herman for 75 cents.
Herman looks pretty creepy in the picture. But he’s just a rubber puppet. Stick your finger through the bottom of the box and “make him lift his head and move around.”
Although several respondents were convinced that something like Herman couldn’t have been offered for sale to kids of the Leave It to Beaver generation, it’s probably because they thought the bug was a real, live insect … which, of course, was what a lot of 60s kids thought when they ordered the thing.
Sea Monkeys
And yet … you could order live buggy things. It’s just that they weren’t advertised as such.
The so-called sea monkeys (pictured as a smiling humanoid family in comic book ads) were actually brine shrimp. They came dehydrated. Just add water and … voilà!
I understand that some sea monkey kits came with plastic aquariums complete with sunken ships and castles. The sides of the aquariums also had built-in magnifying lenses, which I’m sure came in handy, since the average size of these crustaceans is a scant 1.9 centimeters.
According to Harold von Braunhut, the marketing mastermind behind the sea monkey ads, “I think I bought something like 3.2 million pages of comic book advertising a year.” So, it’s not surprising that most newsletter respondents knew about this one.
Sunning up his sea monkey campaign, Braunhut said, “It worked beautifully.” Well, maybe it did for him. Our respondents had a different experience, with Michael Libling summing it up best: “The Sea Monkeys came to life as promised, and promptly shriveled to fish food without performing a single amazing antic or, for that matter, dressing up in fancy clothes and going on dates.”
$1.00 Color TV
It’s 1959, your old black-and-white Motorola gets three channels, and your favorite show (Walt Disney’s Zorro) only airs Thursday nights at 8:00. But it’s Friday afternoon! So, you have two choices: (1) wait a week, or (2) reach into your pocket and take out the 1-inch color TV you ordered from a comic book ad.
No need for an antenna. Reception isn’t an issue because you’ve preloaded the set with a film reel containing a complete episode! Of course, the film isn’t movie film, and the images are just a series of hand-drawn comic panels. But hey, it’s still Zorro, right?
The image above is from the blog site 2719 Hyperion, where you can learn more about the Lindo Company’s $1.00 TV.
Many of our respondents spotted this one right away, with Justin writing, “I guess the $1 TV could have been a model! LOL.”
Live Monkey!
Moving clockwise through the images at the top of this post, we come to what is possibly the most outrageous (egregious?) item sold through the mail: live squirrel monkeys.
An article on the Comic Book Resources website includes the harrowing account of a monkey arriving in a small box and escaping after the package was opened. The little thing was all teeth, claws, and excrement. And yet (surprisingly) the monkey eventually became a beloved pet. So, at least for one kid, the ad delivered on its promise.
X-Ray Glasses
Truth in advertising? Well, the ad does tell us the effect is an “illusion,” even if the image tells another story.
According to Michael Libling:
The X-Ray Specs might have been the most crushing. The lenses were composed of what appeared to be a feather sandwiched between cardboard, the effect a fuzzy blur that fell somewhat short of x-Ray vision. My dream of acquiring at least one of Superman’s powers ended then and there.
Mike went on to say:
As for the fake ad, I’m guessing it was the marijuana-flavored gum.
And that brings us to …
Snapping Gum
Yes, the ad is for snapping, not marijuana gum.
The ad copy read:
Looks like a real package of chewing gum! When the “sucker” reaches for a stick of “free” gum–he gets the shock of his life! A hidden spring snaps his fingers! Very funny! Harmless.
Hard to believe, but even though it was okay to put a live monkey in the mail, shipping marijuana gum to the home … even if the gum was only marijuana flavored … was too much for the 1960s.
How things have changed! Real marijuana can now be shipped to homes in 24 states, but you can’t legally (at least to my knowledge) order a live monkey to save your life! Naturally… if I’m wrong about any of this, I trust readers of this blog will let me know.
Challenge Results
Mike wasn’t the only one who figured marijuana-flavored gum was the item too outrageous for the 60s. Diana also singled it out in response to my Facebook post.
They’ll both be getting a copy of Minute-Men: Execute & Run when it comes out in October.
And There’s More!
Facebook friends David and Ralph posted ads for a seven-foot submarine and an equally large spaceship, both shipped in pieces and assembled at home for hours of fun. Ralph described his as: “Made of cardboard. You lifted the cockpit off to climb in that hole to sit down.”
Free Newsletter
One thing you couldn’t get in the 1960s is the Minute-Men: Execute & Run newsletter.
How times have changed.
Today you can get each bi-weekly installment delivered straight to your e-box simply by entering your address below.
The newsletter features excerpts, artwork, videos, and behind-the-scenes info on Minute-Men: Execute & Run, which will be released on October 14 from Caezik Science Fiction & Fantasy.
Each issue also includes a newsletter challenge like the one covered in this post. In all, it’s more fun than a barrel of mail-order monkeys.
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